Reflection - Luke 22:48

Spurgeon's Morning and Evening today I almost skipped, not that I'm diligent to sit down every day anyways, but because I'm struggling with stress and work and I was hoping for some divine moment where the meditation of the day would just speak directly to my worries. But by God's grace, I feel it speaking to parts of me I'd rather ignore, and that alone is enough confirmation to spend an extra minute on it...

Spurgeon says first thing "The kisses of an enemy are deceitful", not that he's the first one to say it...

Our pastor delivered a great sermon on Sunday that is dove-tailing in my heart with this... He said the most dangerous place to be was in the presence of the Lord Jesus, and to remain unchanged by him. Jesus has words for me which do not feel good in the moment - words I don't even disagree with... but do I fully agree? When he calls out the sin of lust or greed in my heart, do I take his rebuke into the depths of my soul and respond in kind with a contrite heart? Or do I parrot agreement on the surface, but in the darkest depths continue to hold on to the sins that I love?

I have felt so much stress from work and AI recently that I've just been neglecting the rest of my life, and frankly a sharp word from the Lord about orienting my life around the right things is welcome. It stings but I'm smart enough to see how stupid I can be. In my own way I have been betraying the Lord: talking sweetly about him to my family and friends yet daily, for the last couple weeks at least, deprioritizing my time with him and giving into the temptation to always be working and producing something. In the cleanest irony I think I've only made more work and mess for myself in not taking the time each day to slow down and reflect - both personally and in work.

Praise the Lord for friends who speak truth to me, for my wife who cares for me and sees the error I'm leaning into, and ultimately for Jesus himself who has never abandoned me even when I turn 2 blind-eyes away from him.